the new "normal" life

Well, today was the last day of our week away. I woke up early and went for a walk on the beach, crying all the time. We returned to our own house but it is no longer 'home' for my baby girl! I'm still close to tears; being home again just makes it all so much harder!!

Tomorrow [Monday] I return to work and WM and I begin our new 'normal' life [though he's still on holidays for two weeks so maybe it's 'not-so-normal' for now].

The day after the wedding is a blur - I was totally depressed. We drove my parents to Strathfield station, waited for the train, waved them off and I don't think I spoke more than twenty words for the rest of the day. We introverts can be pretty quiet when things get on top of us! I didn't want to do anything; no hobbies held any interest. I wandered from room to room, weeping silent tears for a little girl who had grown up and would not be coming 'home'. At midday I went to bed and slept for two and a half hours. More long, unfulfilled hours then evening came, some television viewing and finally sleep took over the tears [shed and unshed].

Monday dawned; still painful but there was a holiday to get ready for: washing [laundry] and packing to do, and the 90 minute trip east to our destination. I tried not to think or talk about DD and everything was, on the surface, fine.

A week of sun, surf and speaking about things on our minds [as well as a few SMS from a honeymooning DD until - on Tuesday - we told her to stop] brought some relief from the pain. The kind paracetamol brings: it only gives relief, it doesn't take the pain away!

Returning to an empty house is new. And painful. And brings up the tears. Becoming empty-nesters is an excruciatingly painful experience. Thank you all for your support and patience.